You know the feeling when you find something that you never knew you wanted, but now that it’s there, you can’t live without it? I adore those beauty “a-ha” moments; this genius thing, proper name Clarins After Sun Moisturizer Self-Tanning, fills that I’m-already-burnt-but-I-still-want-a-tan void right there. It soothes the sun ouchies while also giving you a fake bake, sooo you bronze even during your sunning breaks. It’s like getting a second chance to erase your sunburn mistakes (and maybe even go out clubbing that night not looking like a walking splotch of pain). OMG. Right? RIGHT?
Apparently, I’m into some sort of abnormally descriptive, sensual thing with sunscreen lately (I blame Summer Roberts). Most recently with spray-on SPF, mainly because I’m kind of uncomfortable with–and by that I mean despise with a nose-wrinkling passion–yet another feeling, this time one that specifically includes spackling on a second layer of cream on a beach-christened bod (read: sandy, stringy, saltwatery wet). Kind of like exfoliating, but skipping the satisfying shower that it’s supposed to be all about and going straight to the heavy lotion. Like I said, I hate it. It’s the one part of the beach experience I can do without (next up: the post-beachside massage situation, where the coconut oil gets in your joints and sand sticks everywhere making you look like breaded chicken but you can’t wash off in the water just yet lest your newly-kneaded muscles shrivel up and die. Now that’s a party.).
So basically, dear Clarins Sunscreen Spray Gentle Milk-Lotion Progressive Tanning* SPF 20, do I need you in my life, or what?
*EDIT: Can you just imagine their lab geeks, with the white coats and flasks, vetting on what constitutes a “progressive” tan, as opposed to a “regressive” one?: “Nah, that one looks too ’80s,” or “Yes, yes, Brooke Shields with a Gisele Bündchen twist. Thank you, doctor.” “No, thank you.”
Obviously, all this sun has gone to my head. I love summer!